The Catch 22 That is Mark Solis

Forgive my hard stance on this one.

I cringe over the new word netizens have coined the last few days inspired by one Mark Joseph Solis – “SOLISIFIED”. The word became synonymous to plagiarism.

The photo that earned him the fame but was not his in the first place (Rappler.com)

El Cuento de Un Ciudad (The Tale of One City)

The feeling of disbelief and devastation has never left me since that morning of September 9 when a cousin phoned mom to ask her to pray over reports of attack by the MNLF in Zamboanga. Mom was clearly worried and I reassured her that it will be over in no time and it is only an isolated scuffle pertuated by Misuari loyalists. 

“Acaba lang se dayun Mom. Tiene lang gaha se demands el maga MNLF por causa serca ya el signing del Bangsamaro framework. Mira tu, hinde caba este dia sale ya sus maga hente (It will soon be over Mom. The MNLF may just have demands since the Bangsamoro framework signing is near. You’ll see, before the day ends, they will retreat).” 

But the day progressed with TV reports of terror and violence engulfing the six coastal areas of Sta. Catalina, Sta. Barbara, Rio Hondo, Talon-Talon, Mampang, Arena Blanco and Kasanyangan.

Aerial shot of the coastal areas engulfed in fire (Source)

I was wrong with my belief that it was going to be temporary - now the armed conflict in Zamboanga enters its 15^th day.

For Just A Moment

We laughed until we had to cry 
And we love right down to our last goodbye 

We were the best, 

I think we'll ever be 

Just you and me 
For just a moment 

About five years ago someone asked me nonchalantly while I was busy tapping my laptop keys, “When we get to the inevitable, will you blog about me?” I had to stop what I was doing, took a sip of his beer and gazed at the shore outside our hotel window. “I promise to write about you. When - that I do not know. But all of these are blog worthy.” He cupped my face, kissed me and said he will be waiting to read what I will have to say about him.

His question tugged a chord in my blogger heart and until this day I can still vividly hear his voice asking me that. I have done a few blog posts about him in the past but it was written with much ambivalence, a perfect example of when love and hate collide. The recent events in my life and hours spent talking with my best friend Anthony and inner posse Myla made me rediscover essentials that I buried after the demise of our relationship.  Perhaps when you are deep in pain, you choose to think about the bad memories and negate the happy ones. Yet when you reach the point when you are good and healed, your eyes become objective and yes, acknowledge those times when you were so happy you didn’t mind if you were to die the next  day.

A Letter for Tony

Dear Dad,

This is my mandatory blog post for you on Fathers' Day. I know you will not understand what a blog post is so let's reserve it for another time. But allow me to get sentimental with this letter and tell you things which I'd like to believe you already know - only this time the rest of the blogosphere is reading. Again, I'll explain what that word means when you're feeling techie.

Dad and Ina-Tay on her 33rd birthday

Why I'm Nitta Sayuri

Image from the web

I’ve been asked this question so many times I’ve actually lost count. The question pertains to my alias in FB. People’s question range from who the hell is Nitta Sayuri, why Nitta Sayuri and does my real name sound so bad that I have to use someone else’s? Once and for all I will answer everything.

Hey you pretty momma!

You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. - Buddha

Photo from the web

There were quite a few times when people would tell me I don't look like a mom after finding out I'm raising a three-year old daughter alone. Quite honestly I don't know how to react because initially, statements like this is supposed to be a compliment but on the other hand, there lies the preconceived notion that mothers are expected to look a certain way. To elaborate, it means you have to let go of yourself because once you give birth you are to fit the motherhood mold. It is the sad truth that the moment we take ourselves for granted, we are also killing little by little our self esteem. 

A love letter to Mummy

Dear Mum,

Let me tell you again that you are one of life's greatest blessings to me - and I mean every word that I just typed. Thank you for being the prayerful mother that you are. Quite frankly, I can't imagine where I or Ton-ton will be without your prayers for our success and protection. Sorry that sometimes I fall short of sugar coating things and I say it upfront. I'm sorry because I was hard-headed and didn't listen when you told me to steer clear of the man who eventually became Leia's dad. I'm sorry for the many times I failed you because I thought I knew what I was doing only to realize the folly of my actions too late. I'm sorry that I have to make the difficult decision to work away from home and be far from you and Leia, sorry that you have to do the cooking again (NOTE: Mum and I refuse to allow the helps to cook; my brother and I got our discriminating palates from Mum).

Ina-Tay, Mummy and Leia

Why I love working with expats

Lately, I have allowed myself to go to uncharted territories. The journey so far has been exhilarating, I can't confidently say though it's rewarding because I have yet to see. But these new directions caused me to be pensive and press rewind. I have gone this far because I learned from some of the best people to work with - expats. 

Now before you raise that eyebrow and ask how much I must've been paid to write this post, allow me to qualify my statement. I know some of you have horror stories about working with foreign nationals and how they caused you sleepless nights and fleeting moments of insanity. Albeit some who made me work wounded to the point of almost second-guessing my capabilities that took so long to build, my experience is generally happy and meaningful. 

We were one big happy family! (circa 2004). 

I noticed that I actually work better with foreigners than with Filipinos. I'm not being critical of my own race here, however I personally find it relatively easier to share the four corners of an office with them. And from my years of experience with them, here are some reasons why: 

Birds and the bees 2013 version

I recently stumbled on this photo on my FB personal page. As a mommy blogger, I just found it downright funny. I shared it and immediately some friends thought so too. I think it is the tech age's version of the classic birds and the bees story when kids start getting curious how babies are made.

I tried to look back and remember what my folks' response was to me when I asked them this dreaded question. I can't remember anything! I believe I was already in elementary when I began understanding reproduction and became enlightened. Now that my daughter is three, she is becoming more and more inquisitive until one night, while I was putting her to sleep, she asked me, "Mama, saan galing ang babies"? Believe me, it beats the work of an alarm clock because after I heard her question, my brain immediately went to fifth gear. Yikes, heaven help me come up with a respectable answer - pronto!

An open letter to a new blogger

"ate lany, lookie! I have a blog na din! role model man gud tika  good example. HAHA. pero bitaw ui, it's to pass the time, and to help me improve sa akong pagsulat... nagbutang ko ug link sa imong blog didto sa akong blogroll :))" 

http://medicalschoolroadtrip.blogspot.com/

This was a message I received a few minutes ago from my cousin Karla or Mae-mae as we fondly call her. Immediately I started crying because I was so overwhelmed that I inspired her to make her own blog. She even called me her role model. *tears* Oh Mae...

Repost: Love letter to Filipinos by Dr. David Harwell

This letter was written to all of us by an American Dr. David H. Harwell and appeared in Philippine Daily Inquirer Commentary on February 17, 2013. I read it and had goosebumps. I am re-posting it here hoping that it will warm your brown spirit as it did in mine.

-o0o-

I am writing to thank Filipinos for the way you have treated me here, and to pass on a lesson I learned from observing the differences between your culture and mine over the years.

I am an expatriate worker. I refer to myself as an OAW, an overseas American worker, as a bad joke. The work I do involves a lot of traveling and changing locations, and I do it alone, without family. I have been in 21 countries now, not including my own. It was fun at first.  Now, many years later, I am getting tired. The Philippines remains my favorite country of all, though, and I’d like to tell you why before I have to go away again.

I have lived for short periods here, traveled here, and have family and friends here. My own family of origin in the United States is like that of many Americans—not much of a family. Americans do not stay very close to their families, geographically or emotionally, and that is a major mistake. I have long been looking for a home and a family, and the Philippines is the only place I have lived where people honestly seem to understand how important their families are.

No homework, no cry

I am a child of that time where the definition of being "intelligent" was only limited to whether you can do mental Math or you can spell "floccinaucinihilipilification" without batting an eyelash. Never mind if you're good at music, sports, arts or what-have-you, back in the 80s it just didn't fit the bill. My parents jumped on to the bandwagon and set a study routine for me - on my first year in school. I still remember this pink cartolina posted on the bedroom wall where my schedules from Sunday evening to Friday afternoon were written. I was only allowed two hours of play on weekday and no TV except on weekends. I was scared of the punishment so I never tried disobeying my folks. The schedule was also imposed on my younger brother three years later but they didn't have much success with him.

Image from Photobucket

A requiem for Tatay

This is my tribute to one of the male figures in my life, a little sentimental but every word is from my heart. Tatay, this is for you.

I gazed at his coffin last night and I have to smile while fighting back tears. Our next door neighbor of 27 years (we lived at Fortune since I was five years old - do the math how old I am now), Tatay as we fondly call him, joined our Creator dawn of Sunday. A day after I came home for good from GenSan. It was bittersweet.

My blog, my life

Tonight I was on a frenzy inviting my FB friends to like my blog. The blogging bug has successfully bit me again. Before clicking the "LIKE" button, I think it is only but fair that you get to know what you're getting yourself into (or not)!

Yours truly and the reason for my existence

An Ina-Tay Writes is my personal blog which I started in 2009 when I gave birth and my life as a single parent began. This blog is an off-shoot of the now dead Memoirs of an Urban Drama Queen and I decided on an image overhaul. Gone was the "I-live-for-the-moment" working girl to usher in my new role as a parent. Ina-Tay is a word play of two Filipino words - Inay (mother) and Itay (father). As a single parent, I play both roles 24/7. My auto reply when people ask about my civil status is "I am an Ina-Tay"! Ina-Tay is also referred to as "package deal" or "buy one, take one". Call it however you like it but it does not change the fact that no, I am not married but yes, I have a kid.

A bum's to-do list

In a week's time my consultancy contract with a mining company will end. In retrospect, those were 12 months full of learning, self-discovery, new friendships and an awful lot of soul searching. It allowed me to gain my self confidence back after being a full time Ina-Tay to Leia and being Mum's private duty nurse when she was having her Chemo. It gave me the perfect chance to prove to myself, more than anybody else, that I still have what it takes to get things done. I will devote one entire post in the coming days telling you more about it.

People have been asking me which firm I will be transferring to. They think I have gone bananas when I tell them I'm going to be jobless when I go back to Davao. Yes, I gave myself permission to be a bum for at least a month, to be part of the Department of Labor's unemployed statistics. It is a conscious decision hence I have not moved heaven and earth (yet) to get a job.

Photo: http://themetapicture.com

So you may ask, what do I intend to do with all these time in my hands?

"Miss Mama"

"The world is full of women blindsided by the unceasing demands of motherhood, still flabbergasted by how a job can be terrific and tortuous." - Anna Quindlen

Ina-Tay and the love of her life one fine night...

I arrived yesterday afternoon in Davao for my weekend break - tired, hungry and disappointed. When I got home, Leia hasn't waken up from her nap so I took a quick lunch and in between mouthfuls explained to Mum why I haven't received my first paycheck. I was in my nega mode when my daughter showed up in the kitchen and gave me the smile that melted my heart and forgot the fact that my salary has been delayed for two weeks now.

An Ode to Mum

This post is way, way overdue but with a valid reason. I have been swamped at work and I avoid using my company-issued laptop for blogging. Since my 31-year old Ina-Tay back can only accommodate the weight of one laptop, I had to leave my old but very reliable personal laptop at home. Hence the delay.

WE ARE FAMILY! Ina-Tay (pardon my eye bags; this was after Christmas), Mummy, Ton-ton and baby Leia

Without much ado, I want to greet my female parental unit aka Mummy, a very happy birthday. Sorry that I haven't taken you to some fancy dinner because I've not been paid yet. But a certain portion of my paycheck is earmarked for the delayed birthday dinner and a little something for you.

The One That Got Away

For maximum impact, may I suggest that you listen to Lou Pardini's Always Be There For You while reading this post. :)



Photo from the web

I'm not on a dating frenzy, it just so happened that last week I accepted a date from a former colleague Mr. Suave and from Monday afternoon until Thursday noon, I was in the jungle that is Makati on official business. Since the meetings and dinner meetings ended by 8:00 pm, I have enough time to touch base with old friends which I did. Top of the list was my ex turned really good friend Mel.

Ina-Tay and Mr. Suave on a DATE

Photo from the web

After more than three years, I went on an official date last night.

My Latest Win - L'Oreal Total Repair

I must have done a lot of good lately because a lot of good things have come upon your Ina-Tay. Santa's helper this time around was Ro-Ann and her All The Vanity Blog! Yes, I won a blog giveaway again, a week after my first.Talk about being blessed! That's two in a row!

Win number 2 for Ina-Tay!